GuysNamedMike | Main / Name Your Kid Mike

Reasons to name your son, or daughter, Mike:

Proven fact that Mike’s have a higher sperm count. It’s science.

Children named Mike aren’t named something stupid, like Jeff or Walter.

If you name your daughter Mike, she’s likely to be a tomboy, and then if you get her into basketball, she could very easily become a WNBA star, cause I mean, have you seen them? I could be a WNBA star.

Mike’s are 37% more likely to be successful.

Mike’s are 48% more likely to be fake statisticians.

If you change some letters in the name Mike, you can very easily get Milk. Neat, right?

You can call them Mikey.

If they don't like the name Mikey, you can kick them.

When your child gets taken away after being abused, it'll be hard for you to track them down cause they have such a common name. Now they're safe.

They'll have something in common with the 5 people they meet in Heaven, who are coincidentally enough, also named Mike.